The end of the year is upon us and I am feeling as lazy as ever, but I don’t have an option to be lazy so I put off all my hobbies because I’m tired and I’m working most of the time. I’ll have some down time before Christmas, so that is nice but I have some goals once again. I’ll come up with one goal everyday for the new year and I will write about it here, good idea, right? Easy enough for my winter blues.
I’ve been in a mental state of fatigue for the past month or so, maybe the holidays in retail have really run me dry or it’s just the holidays in general that make me weary. Either way, once the new year hits, I’m somehow going to find all the energy and motivation that I’ll be lacking and my tired days will be gone!!! No, I’ll just force myself to get out of bed and do the yoga that I know will make my mind come back to life and I will wake up in the poses, feeling refreshed and brightened and most importantly happy to be alive in my body. That’s what I love about yoga, it makes me love my body more! So here’s my idea for the new year. I have yet to really commit to a full yoga practice for a full thirty days, I always gave up halfway though and hit snooze, but lately I’ve been waking up earlier than normal and doing some mini yoga challenges. This month of December I am going to work on getting a daily routine down and hopefully by the new year I can do an hour of yoga each day. I know I can do it, I have to put my mind to it!
I’m excited for what the future holds and I look forward to challenging myself to keep a positive atmosphere! I’m getting tired, I got to wake up kind of early? Maybe I’ll it snooze.
Hugo CoelhoI promise: To cuddle with you when you’re feeling sick. To always share my last slice of pizza. To text you goodnight if you’re not sleeping next to me. To make you breakfast in bed every once in a while, just because. I promise: To buy your favorite beer when I’m at the grocery…
I’m rewriting today. I am going through an old story and rewriting every word, exactly how I wrote it a few years ago. Only now I’ve gotten a different idea in how to portray this and I’ve changed one character. Not the main one, but their father. I changed him and he has changed the character completely. It used to be sort of like a fairytale but now it has turned a little darker. It’s not horrible though. I just wanted to let everyone know that I am trying to write again and so far it going good. I feel motivated but still distracted. It’s getting late. I finally got a doctors appointment today and got up to speed with everything, hooray! I also did some yoga, that was pleasant. I even worked up a bit of a sweat. I am watching a video level one flexibility with Sarah Beth, I love her, she is a huge inspiration. I am going to do the flexibility video everyday until I am satisfied and feeling ready for the next one.
Mondays and Tuesdays are my days off, but they quickly turned to crap when I woke up on both days with a stuff and site neck. It even hit my shoulders. So I bought a new pillow today and it’s pretty nice. So far so
I gotta get to sleep soon. Work in the morning.
I just wanted to tell you I’m alive and slowly getting things together in my life.
I honestly get distracted too much. I’m working on it!
I was very tired last post. I need to sleep more.
I’m sitting here thinking about summer.
The sunshine, the lake, the bugs. All of the sounds of life. I’m excited. It’s been rainy but that just means summer is around the corner. I want to go hike, walk, swim, and camp. I got a lot of nature lovin’ to do.
I want to photograph my summer. I want to hammock the evenings away.
I can’t wait for sunshine and cicada calls.
In regards to relationships, you can not expect to get something, if you do not give anything. Does that make sense?
Let me start from the beginning. Right now I am snuggled with my blanket against a wall. I’m super cozy and I know I can’t sleep because I slept all day. My mind is wandering and I am just here. I an not doing anything at all, no YouTube, no Facebook, no Netflix. I am just here. In the moment.
Let’s begin. (This is gonna be a weird one.)
My Sunday normally starts around, 5 o’clock in the morning. But today for some reason I woke up late. I know, I know, you’re probably thinking its the best thing ever, but I woke up late for work. When I was sleeping, I apparently forgot that I had one more day of work.
I sped, who wouldn’t. I got there at 6:10 Not bad for leaving at 5:59. It’s a 25 minute drive. I’m sorry for speeding. I won’t do it again. I just needed to get there, I can’t afford not to be there. I called and told them I would be 15 to 25 minutes late too.
Mothers day is a busy day at a hotel downtown. I loved it. It kept my mind off of drowsy thoughts. Then I got home. It was 12:20. I was tired. I had a good day and I wanted to sleep. My boyfriend was at work. Time for myself. He worked a double today and probably pulled it all the way through.
I slept all day then went to dinner by myself had two fabulous drinks and a meal. Got home a while later and attempted to sleep but really just laid in bed and now it’s 12:23 am and he still isn’t home. That’s why I’m stuck in some drowsy thoughts guys. Thinking about the negativity and trying to explain it all. How I feel and how I think a relationship should go, not to just benefit me. We need better communication. And I’m struggling to put my thoughts into words. Until the few moments where I got up and grabbed my phone to write this.
Now, what I came up with is compromise. I never really understood what it meant and why it was needed in relationships until now. Because we’re living together and we have shared space, but also because we are two different people coming together with love. We have to give and take to make it work when your comitted. In a committed relationship. How else do you let someone you love do things you don’t like? And vice versa, how can they let you do something that they don’t like. But why even do it. Don’t you want to make the other person happy, so why do things that knowingly make them upset. Discuss the topic. Learn eachothers feelings. Compromise. In a relationship you can’t be completely selfish, nor your partner. Right? Or wrong? Tell me your opinions? This is like a thing I think about a lot. It’s a shadow.
It’s Saturday morning and all I want to do is go back to bed, but this is my lovely view downtown. The clouds are shrouding the city but the sun is still persistent to shine through.
In the mornings, I make coffee in a hotel from 6 to 11 or so. I do this 5 days a week, each day is different. The weather is changing slightly. I used to record pictures of my view everyone sunrise. Now it’s getting to early for me to do that. I love watching night turn into Dawn. The rising sun shining through the buildings. I love waking up before everyone else. Granted, I don’t get a lot of sleep, but being an early riser is nice. Its very calming and it’s a time where I can collect myself without the distraction of others.
I wake up between 4:30 and 5:20 and I’m out the door at 5:30 no matter what.
Today is the first day of the farmer’s market downtown and it’s kinda busy. Saturday’s are going to keep being busy I guess because of it. I want more people to get coffee so I can keep busy.
I work behind a bar and have access to mixing ingredients. I like playing around with flavors in coffee and lemonade. Well, that’s what I wanted to say.
It’s early afternoon, I sent my boyfriend off to work and quickly decided what I wanted to do. There were so many options, I could spend more time working out, maybe go for a run…. I could go for a drive then run.
Oh! I know, I could go hammocking and since the sky was beautiful, I’ll bring my camera and tripod. So I took the long way out to the lake, stopped on the side of the road and snapped a few scenic views here and there.
I continued on my journey to hammock, destined to stop anywhere by any means to take a photo. All winter, I’ve been wanting to take some photos, but I was not ready to shoot some cold things. Spring is here and my heart is pumping. I feel so good in the nice weather, but I think everyone does. I drove with my windows down and my sun roof open, thinking of nothing and listening to the Good Vibes playlist on Spotify. It’s kind of my feel good music.
When I got to the park I wanted to hammock at, it was closed. Luckily the park is next to a campground where there was available parking. I grabbed my backpack and my tripod and began my short hike to my two trees.
At first I wanted to walk all the way to the back of the park, try to get to an opening in the trees where I could set up my hammock and get an awesome view of the lake, I’ll have to find that next time though. When I got about halfway, I heard construction going on in the nearby neighborhood and I decided that dull buzzing sound was not on my list of happiness today and turned around. I found two trees that seemed complicated by made due and set up my mini camp. I took a few videos and photos of myself in the hammock because why not and I also wrote a little in my journal. I decided that the nature was doing wonders for me, so I might as well enjoy it.
After my hammock craving was satisfied for today, I packed up and head out towards the military tanks by a base camp. I climbed on top of one and took pictures as the sun drifted to the other side of the world. It was a beautiful sunset, perfect for a beautiful day.
I am in Washington mode. I’m going to do all that I can to get a better paying job, while still working at Teavana. I’m going to try to pay off credit card debt and car payments and attempt to save money for my move eventually hopefully 2 years. I would love to be out faster, so I even went as far as to set up a GoFundMe page. https://www.gofundme.com/h3t9h8mc
So that happened. The struggle of money is real.
Last night I was at my friends house and hanging out with her until 1:30 AM. It helped me remember that time flies when your having fun. That’s what I did last night, I had an awesome time just hanging out. It was wonderful. This person is just wonderful in general. There wasn’t a single boring moment. I wanted to stay over there all night. We were upstairs talking while her boyfriend and friends play with music really really loud in the basement. It was awesome. I loved it, I was completely okay with it wherever we were in the house. It was, in fact, my type of music. We shared stories and talked about pretty much anything, it was all over the place. I, once again, loved it. No judgement, awesome knowledge and some wisdom for me. I shared my story characters and plot ideas. It got even better when we drank tea. I feel like that was a highlight of the night, since right before that, we drove to hyvee and got chips n dip.
Oh! I almost forgot to mention that any situation that includes pets and, more importantly: cute, fat, sassy cats, becomes an instant winner. She has a cat and three dogs in her house. Love it. Her roomates were cool, I was in a happy place. Positive vibes all around. I loved it.
It was a really good night and I needed that I’m my life right now. I need to keep looking up.
I’m another Positive note, I’m still working out. Just two days now, but I’m actually doing it. Yesterday I cut out a lot of sugar. I drank a total of five 16 oz cups. Four at work, three of them were iced.
-Silver Needle, Purify, Dragonfruit Devotion
-Golden Dragon, Peachberry Jasmine Sutra
The other, hot.
-Darjeeling de Triomphe
-Winterberry (Strawberry Grapefruit Xue Long & Strawberry Lemonade)
The only tea that was sweetend was the last one. It is one of my favorites and I wanted a tiny treat and It was perfect. I raved about it to my friend. I ate decently, nothing super sweet or greasy. Subway, chips n dip. Ham and cheese. I was pretty satisfied with that.