Today started out okay. Even though every day, it takes more and more for me to get out of bed. I did what I needed to do. I read some stuff a little bit, now I am just feeling like crap. I don’t know. I worked out too, but it didn’t help that much. I work tonight, like every night. I just feel like I want to waste away right now. I don’t know why.

I’m not as far down as I used to be, but I just keep thinking and that gets me in the wrong places-in my head. I am trying to change my life around, but it doesn’t help when my family is the major part of all my feelings. I want my dad and his mistress to move out soon. Mother, Sean and I will sort out the house and get better. I will eventually get a stable job and live on my own. 

I will probably be alone, too. I don’t talk to my friends much, and I don’t see anyone much either. Depressing. I’m okay for now though. I just need to get everything sorted. Soon.

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