December Never Ends: Chapter Seven

After a while of pacing around my room, I finally opened it up again and traced my fingers over the printed words of my name. I slowly shaped the word in my mouth and whispered it. “I feel uneasy here and unsafe.” I closed the journal and put it underneath the mattress. “December!” May called from upstairs. “Dinner’s ready!” I ran up the stairs and placed my self at the end of the table, across from May and Nick. “So, December,” May cleared her throat. “How do you like your mother’s bed?” “Oh, uh… It’s big and beautiful.” I smiled and nodded my head. My head was in other places, pondering the thoughts of her journal and why she started it with an introduction for me. “That’s wonderful, your mother picked it out at a very elegant store, in fact…” Her voice faded with the rise of my thoughts. I chewed on my food and pretended to listen. “Uh..” I cleared my throat. “Call me May.” She said, “I don’t like the sound of ‘grandmother’ or ‘grandma’ or any other nickname that refers to how old I am…” She trailed off. I laughed a little and looked at her. “Do you have anything else of my mothers?” She shook her head, “It should all be downstairs, why?” “Oh, no reason.” I coughed and stood up. “Thank you for the food.” I smiled and made my way to the kitchen to clear my plate, then head back to my room. I looked around the room a bit, then sighed. “Well, I better unpack…” I looked at the closet. “How much room is in there?” I mumbled and opened the doors. To my surprise, there were a lot of Victorian style dresses and some accessories. I push them to the side and noticed a very stylish double breasted trench coat. I grabbed it and put it on, it fit. My mother is the exact same size as me, straight down to the core. I pulled it off and threw it on the bed in a neat fashion and went back to the closet. I noticed a door where the coat used to be. It wouldn’t budge. I mumbled and grunted, frustrated and looked back at the bed. “Ah!” An idea sprang into my mind, I looked at the box that lay on the bed and I opened it. I shook the box upside down and grabbed the key that fell out. “Lets see if this works… This has got to be… Yes!” It unlocked and I opened it. There was another closet, filled with stylish and fashionable clothes from the past couple years.  I left the second closet and ran back up the stairs to find May, who was doing the dishes. “May, why does she have…” I paused and caught my breath. “Uh, never mind. The thought just left me…” I laughed and she looked at me with a straight face with a hint of confusion but also knowledge. “There is everything down there. Everything that she owned.” She swallowed and looked back down to the dishes and continued scrubbing. “Hm. Okay.” I turned around and let my face form into a look of pondering. “When you leave, I will call for a moving truck for you. She would want you to have what she had.” I nodded and she smiled. “Now, go settle in and rest. Okay?” “Okay. Thank you.” I walked back downstairs and looked at myself in the mirror. The clothing doesn’t really suit my figure and it looked plain and dull. I walked to the second closet and grabbed some combat boots, dark skinny jeans, a deep violet lacey tank top and then threw on a see-through, grey, bat winged shirt. I walked back out to the mirror and gasped at my reflection. Slowly and carefully I drew my hands back and twisted my hair into a low and loose bun. “I look… good.” I swallowed and smiled to myself. I felt my esteem rise as I sunk into self obsession. It was a new feeling, compared to the old days where I felt dreadful and unattractive. With my mother’s clothing, I felt beautiful, and my age. I flopped on the bed and stared at the ceiling, contemplating the new closet that I now own. I slinked off the bed and slid to the floor. I sighed and stood up. I thought to myself, “I’m thirsty. My throat hurts.” I groaned as I paced up the stairs. Grandma was sitting at the table reading the news. I looked around and didn’t see Grandpa. Now that I noticed he, he isn’t around a lot. I clear my throat. “Where is grandpa, um.. Nick?” “He went shopping.” “Why do I never see him.” “You remind us of your mother so well, it’s hard for him since Ester was his baby girl.” She swallowed. “I see.” I stuttered. “Don’t apologize.” She glanced at me with a sweet smile. “What?” “You are the spitting image of Ester, and it’s beautiful to me. I love you as my granddaughter and you do not need to be sorry for looking like her. I believe it is a blessing.” “Oh. I don’t know what to say…” I laughed uncomfortably. “I am going for a walk around the neighborhood. I’ll be back later.” “Be careful.” “I will.” I walked out of the kitchen, and as I grabbed my jacket and scarf, I faintly hear May’s voice. “There is a cemetery on the hill out there; your parent’s grave is at the top, under the big tree.” I smiled to myself and left the house. The sun is high in the sky, and the winter breeze caressed my face. The leaves were falling from the trees, and as I walked over them, the crunched underneath my feet. I tucked my chin into my scarf and walked along the fence. There weren’t many houses like my grandmother’s, only apartments and small farm houses. By far, her house is the most beautiful on the block. However, there were many strip malls and small stores, which added to the beauty of the entire street. There are so many different elegant designs, and each store gives off a feeling of elegance. I walk to the end of the street, and my steps quicken when I see the cemetery. The end of the street is a dead in, as well as the entrance to the local graveyard. The leaves blew across the street in a sudden breeze, and the gate creaked open. I enter cautiously and repeat my grandmother’s words. “The grave is at the top of the hill.” I smile to myself and run to the far end of the graveyard. I spot the hill and a tall tree on top of it. Two dark figures stood by their grave, and I hesitated. “Maybe they are old time friends!” I thought to myself and ran up to see them. “Hello?” I mumbled through the hair that has fallen in my face. The woman turned and smiled at me. “Hello again.”