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A happy picture…

ImageA happy picture, for a sad post.

So, I was at work-went in late. No break as punishment, whatever. Then at the time near closing, my mother comes in and asks for stuff that were out of, and she tells me the most amazing news. “Your father wants to go his separate ways.” Wait… what!? Separate ways? She told me this and I wanted to cry, in the middle of working.

My father is a cheater, he is a lying cheater, yet I still love him. Yet my mother still loves me. I don’t know if this situation will last, but I don’t know what to think of it. I sent my father a text that read Thanks for thinking of me in your decisions. Then he calls me after work when I am with mom, and then he says to call back. When I get home, I call back and we talk and I silently cry.

He says “I’ll give her a month to leave, you can stay at the house, but she has to go.” 
“What? I’d be staying alone then!” 
“Not for long.”
“What.” I stop in mid thought. “Would there be a woman at the house?” I say with a irritated tone.
“What if there was?”
“No, thanks.”
We go on like that for a couple more minutes and I describe how I would feel about living with another woman, that I would probably not like. He tells me that if I live with my mom and she finds another man than there wouldn’t be a difference, but there would be. For one, If mom did find another man, she would be home as well as that man, so I would be a little comfortable. Another thing, if I was at home, here, with a strange woman… I wouldn’t like that, it wouldn’t be fine at all. For one, my father wouldn’t be home so I would be uncomfortable and probably bitch at the lady because, quite frankly, I don’t want any other woman other than my mother walking in the house. Since I feel that it is my home, and I don’t want anyone who I am not comfortable with stepping in the house. It’s very confusing. Furthermore, to be told these things after a good day at work, it really brings my day down.

Another thing! My father told me that his separation with my mother was like my last relationship with the man I love. I yelled at him and told him that there was no similarity. With him and I, there was no one else attached to our connection, so it didn’t hurt anyone else, but with their relationship, I am attached to them being together. I love them, both and I love them together, even though they only focus on the bad, they still have some good things with their relationship, and what really makes me mad is that he doesn’t get that I am attached to them both, and I already miss my dad a lot that he is gone and doing who knows what, but seriously… I’d feel really sorry for the woman he told whatever lies this time. 

I don’t know at all how I feel about this. I should learn not to take things seriously between my parents, but this is a little too much. I don’t know. I had a long day, and… ugh, this is confusing.

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