Monthly Archives: March 2013

Laughing Still

As, everyone who reads my blog knows, I went to the dentist and I got my tooth pulled and stitched. I’m not supposed to talk much, or laugh, or strain the area. Unfortunately, I have been failing at that task, but I haven’t ripped a stitch. 

I’ve been watching this youtuber recently and I love him. Here’s his URL. http://www.youtube.com/user/markiplierGAME 

A note to you Mark, if you ever want to read this, I seriously love your videos, you make my day in every video of yours. You make me laugh and you can make me cry(of course, it’s the fun kind). I have been home sick for two days now and I am watching your Drunk Minecraft season 1 videos non stop, and I can hear my mother yelling at me to shut up because I am not supposed to laugh, but I can’t help it! They are too funny and it makes me happy! I thought I should let you know that I love what you do and I just love you. Is that weird? Probably, but whatever. I hope you read this someday, if not… well alrighty then. 

Thanks for reading, and I suggest everyone to check out his videos! They are amazing.

Hello

Hello there, lately I haven’t been that busy, I have just been very distracted. I’m on YouTube a lot, which surprises me in a lot of ways. I am also Tumblr quite a bit too.

I have been doing yoga, almost everyday so far. I was going to do it yesterday, however my video wouldn’t play, so I couldn’t do it. It made me sad, because of this really good workout on there.

I haven’t been drinking soda or eating candy for a while, but today I accidentally and purposefully did. I had one cookie, and a can of Coca Cola. The cookie was accidental, I realized I was eating sugar when I was halfway done with it, it kinda made me sad. Then, just a few minutes ago, I grabbed a soda. I regret it now, because it just gave me a headache. But, I needed some quick, cold caffeine so I don’t fall asleep.

Edit 3.27

So I never finished that post last time, so I will put two days into one big post. I don’t remember what I was going to finish with that post, it’s always just an update.

Today, I got my tooth pulled, finally. I was so nervous, when I got a tooth pulled before, it hurt really bad, so I got really nervous this time. This time around, only one needle hurt, and it hurt, I almost cried. I have a bad pain tolerance I guess. They pulled the tooth out and then they had to stitch up the socket because my tooth had grown into my sinus area, so there was a hole there. They stitched part of the tissue from my cheek to the socket, and there is this irritating tightness that’s constant unless I am on my medication. I have to be extra careful, so I don’t rip a stitch and have to get the process all over again.

I ended up going back to school, I always get so nervous when I don’t go to school, and I feel awkward and behind. I haven’t been able to focus on anything today. It really sucks, and I might not be able to focus tomorrow too. I have a feeling it’s going to hurt worst tomorrow, good thing I have meds. My mother gave me the choice to stay home and if I do, I will probably clean my room and do my laundry.

I’ve been laying in bed since I got home at four thirty, and I’ve been in a constant irritation, but it’s becoming normal now. I feel like my socket is bleeding, or it’s just the taste of flesh, like metallic, the taste of blood. It’s probably the taste of flesh.

You know, the meds make me sick and lose my appetite  I bought this sandwich from my work, and now it just sounds unappealing and I want to puke, but it’s probably my meds that make me have an upset stomach. And what makes me really upset, is that I can not do my certain yoga poses that I love, like inversions and bends. I can not be upside down or bend over. It’s sad. On another note, i need to save up money for a new laptop for some games that I would like to play.

I also just realized that I am a bit high from my meds, and I only noticed that when I stood up and talked and stuff like that. I’m a strange person. I am now going to rest a lot more and fall asleep watching Youtube and stuff. See ya later!

 

 

Recently

I’ve been really neglecting my blog, haven’t I? 

I’m sorry.

It’s spring break. I’ve been doing Yoga, and hanging around my house when I am not working. I work all week, the nights. But yesterday, I worked a split shift, 7 – 1:30 then I had a dentist appointment and I got out at 3. Then I rested for less than 40 minutes, headed to work 4 – 8. It was exhausting. Last night, I did meditate because I was shocked at all the lies that I believed from someone. I meditated to clear my mind, and it worked. I really enjoy it now. I decided not to get into a relationship anymore, and I decided to focus on Yoga, school, and work. 

I changed my diet, it’s basically vegetarian but I am choosing to stick with poultry. My diet basically didn’t change, but I won’t eat hamburger’s or ham, beef, steak. I won’t eat ribs or anything like that anymore. I also stopped drinking soda, I am weaning myself from it, slowly. I drink tea, water, and milk. I am no longer eating sweets too, like cookies, chocolate, candy. I won’t any of that now. 

I have a dentist appointment next Wednesday. The oral surgeon’s office, I guess. I am going to get a tooth pulled, and it hurts to the point where I don’t want to be awake. When I went to the dentist’s office yesterday, they warned me about a tooth. The x-rays showed two teeth that are almost identical, however, one tooth has a indentation in the root of the tooth, inside my gums. The indentation is almost touching my nerve, and so the dentist told me to call if I have any problems with that tooth. It makes me feel weary. Another thing with the cavity that will be pulled, it’s right underneath my sinus’s, usually, it’s supposed to be the wisdom teeth, which I have in, that are under the sinus’s and that’s why most people want to get their wisdom teeth pulled, because if they get cavities, it’s harder to fix. 

Anyway, it’s nice out, and I want to get some sunshine and so I am going to grab the mail. 

Today

Today is the last day for my desire of sweets. 

I ate a lot of oreos and drank some pop. I declared that this is the last time that I was indulge in the sweetness. I want to be healthy, so I am going to start tomorrow for sure. I’m going to drink water and eat healthy. I will practice Yoga and I will practice on learning. I will fix my motivation and I will fix my determination. 

It’s going to be hard, I want to already give up, but I won’t. This is my way towards happiness and a better life overall. It’s better for me and everyone else around me.

I’m getting sick of being unmotivated and lazy. I want to change everything and I am getting sick of needing to depend on other people. I need only myself and my family. I even need to change some of my friends and everything else. 

I might be moving as well. My mother, brother, Vanessa, and I are trying to save money so we can move to Des Moines. It’d be a nice change. I will keep my job still, I enjoy it too much to quit, and everybody likes me too-at least, I’d like to believe that, and so I will. 

Future

So, I found out yesterday, that my mother is sick. I don’t want to give out the information to the world until I know what it is for a fact. It may or may not be very bad. I’m not sure how to take it all in, but I guess I have to repress it until my mother can be strong on her own. She is working a lot and sometimes she drinks at night and she cries. Last night she came into my room wanting to just sit there with me. It was kind of awkward. 

I hope she is alright. I hope they find out answers. That would be good. 

Summer Dragonfly

**This is a short story for my Psych class. I love it. We had to mention these words:

  1. Free association
  2. unconscious
  3. ego
  4. Id
  5. Inferiority Complex
  6. (2) Defense Mechanisms
  7. personality
  8. psychoanalysis
  9. Superego

I think I got it good!  Continue reading

Awkward

Such awkward feelings, between a lot of people. I don’t know how to explain it. I am talking to Nick again, it’s been a long time and it’s pretty refreshing. I missed his goofy ways. Along with talking to him, I have discovered that I am over him. I tried talking to my most recent ex, Bryce. He claims it’s a little awkward because we’ve been avoiding each other. Oh well. I want to reconnect my friendships before they all disappear at the end of the year anyway. I don’t want awkward things to happen anymore. 

I finally got my doctors appointment. My grandmother told me that I should get a full physical and blood work and all that stuff done. I need to make a dentists appointment soon.

This was just a quick update, I’ll explain more about what’s been going on later. I have to head out!

The Heart of The Earth: Part One

In the year 2093, plants rule over the technological world. Back in 2012 they have planted their seeds into the heart of the Earth and have set out to destroy the major cities of the world, which they have succeeded. Most of the Earth has become a major jungle; filled with miscellaneous plants, animals, and unknown creatures. The population has decreased, as people died out of starvation, and suffering. Many have not been able to adapt to the area surrounding them, but the rest have survived this life changing impact by adapting.

The major cities around the world have been populated by the surviving people. In the United States, the only areas that have partly survived are Portland and Washington D.C. In Europe; Helsinki, Finland and Rome, Italy. In Asia; Beijing, China and Tokyo, Japan. In Australia, Sydney is left. Those are the seven cities that have stood through the destruction of the world. Those places, however, are now piles of junk, scrap metal, and broken homes, but they are homes to the surviving people of the world.

The city with the least amount of people is Helsinki; it has a population with less than 1,000. It is the only city which has made the greatest change the future will face. The children and the adults in the city have not heard the name for years; it has become lost to them. In the village, the people have named it Whisper-winds, for the wind can whisper deadly tunes to them at night. That is why no one ever comes out at dark, the night steals them away.

The village, Whisper-winds is located on a hill, with many bends that have been carved by the Earth itself. Heaps of junk has been forged into homes for the villagers. Many houses look pretty well-built and kept, some made of metal, or from and old wooden home. Some houses are caves built into the land. Whisper-winds is somewhat dangerous; there are steep cliffs and small areas that can cave in.

Over the bend, on a platform, a family of two reside. Juliet, and her mother, who is very sick. They live on the dangerous side of the village, its steep and unsteady, but they insist to stay.

“Juliet! Juliet! Where do you think you are going?” Her mother yells from their wooden home, which lies on the edge of the bend.

“I am going to see Rain, Mama!” Juliet calls after, as she runs on a rusted platform that heads to the North. It’s small and hard to balance on, but years of practice has its’ perks.

“Be home before dark! You know what will happen!” She warns.

“Yes, Mama.” Juliet moans as she disappears down the hill.

Whisper-winds is a big heap of metal, wood, cement, dirt, and grass. It’s a mix of old homes and scrap metal from the old steel mill that blew. The working class was quite a sight to see; the men of the village making homes with all the scrap materials. “They still have move to go,” Juliet thought as she ran around the bend of dirt and grass. Just around the bend is Rains’ home; he lives with his father who is out working on houses, his mother is deceased.

“Rain! Rain!” Juliet screams and jumps. “Where are you!” She sings.

“I’m right behind you,” He laughs and takes her hand. “Follow me, I found and amazing place to show you!”

“Where is it?” She asks as he leads her down the hill, to a small area outside the village. A couple of steps into the forest and they see a beautiful scene. Their water source, the waterfall. It was quiet and loud at the same time, humming a tune to the birds and the orchids. The mouth of the cave was glistening with droplets of water, bright green grass above and underneath was black as night.

“Rain…”

“It’s beautiful isn’t it?” He sighs and spreads his arms out wide to stretch.

“Yes, very much so. How did you come across this place?” She asks in awe, but unaware that the sun is soon to set. The water has become a light color of the sun.

“I was wandering around the village and I found a small path that led me here, it’s my best discovery.”

Juliet sighs and stares at the colorful spring. The color of the forest and flowers deepen and the sun is almost gone. Rain and Juliet were lost in the serene feeling of the forest.

“What’s that?” Juliet asks as a bright shimmer from the cave becomes more prominent.

“I don’t know, lets check it out.” They haven’t noticed that the sky has gone dark, and faint, frantic voices calling their names hover in the air, unable to reach very far in the dense forest.

Rain and Juliet linger closer to the mouth of the cave; they see a clump of luminescent fireflies hovering underneath.

“Wow!” Juliet’s mouth gapes open at the sight. The sun has set and the voices calling their names have stopped. It’s night-time now, and Juliet and Rain have yet to notice.

“Who knew…” He let out a small sight, while and unnoticeable vine wraps around their wrists.

“There are so many! Look at them!” She leans in closer, putting her hands right on the edge. “I can almost touch one,” She reaches out. “Oh my Gawd, Rain! Look! Look at this!”

“Hey!” Rain grabs her shoulder to steady her. “Be careful, this is not really a good place to be giggling around like that. You could have fallen in.”

“It was too late though, the vine pulls them into the dark cave together. There is no trace that they have been there. No imprints in the grass. The only thing that could have been there is if someone looks down into the cave to see two unconscious children at the bottom.

The next morning Juliet awoke with a mild headache. As her eyes adjust, she has noticed she is alone. “Where is Rain, am I in the cave?” She thought. She looks to her right to see an imperfect circle shape of light on the dirt. Mist hovers above the cave floors, and tiny rocks crumble from the walls and the mouth of the cave. Juliet gets up and steadies herself on the wall, “Rain?” She calls to and empty cave; all she gets back is her own voice.

Past the opening of the cave, Juliet realizes that it isn’t a cave. Avoiding the stream of water and drizzle of the waterfall, she travels further into the hole. “It’s a maze,” She thought.

At Home

It’s a Monday afternoon, and the sky is bright with whitish-grey clouds. The light from the sky is reflecting off the snow on the ground. I awoke at 7 A.M. this morning, glanced outside and relaxed back into my warm bed. The pains in my lower abdomen haven’t worsened but they were still present. It started last night, and I don’t know what the cause of it was. It hurt to lay down and it was very hard to fall asleep. It hurt to breath because the pain amplified with every breath and movement I made. I fell asleep eventually and I decided that it hurt to much to move a lot so my mother called me in sick for school. All day, it was unproductive. Around late morning and early afternoon, the pain left until just recently. I did nothing productive, unless cleaning my room counts. I didn’t really clean it, I just moved things around. The rest of the time, I read manga and looked at posts on Facebook and Tumblr. I decided I was going to write, but I just got comfortable and I don’t want to move. 

That is my mini story about myself today.